Monthly Archives: March 2013

Blade and Blade Runner are NOT the same movie

Yeah, I really thought Wesley Snipes was in Blade Runner until, oh, a few weeks ago. So that’s embarrassing. Anyway…I finished watching the six films for my AFI’s 100 Years…100 Movies project early this month. This is convenient, because I’m going away today to go skiing for the long weekend. I know, two ski trips in one year! This time my dad and I are going to Quebec City to ski at Mont-Sainte-Anne and Le Massif. So that should be fun. But for now, let’s get on to the movies.

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Blade Runner (1982). Clearly I didn’t know much about this one going into it. Well, there aren’t any vampires in it, but it does take place in a dystopian future. Harrison Ford is this retired police officer who’s called back to work to hunt down a bunch of replicants, these androids that look exactly like humans, but are banned from Earth, and are only allowed to live on colonies. They came back to Earth because replicants only live for four years, and they want to live longer. Oh, and Harrison Ford falls in love with a replicant. I don’t know, I like sci-fi and dystopian futures, but I did not love this movie. I got kind of bored with it and I found it all moved really slow and really, there isn’t even that much that happens. It definitely looked good for 1982, but yeah, definitely not my favourite.

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Chinatown (1974). Man, Jack Nicholson and Faye Dunaway are the actual best ever! So this is an awesome mystery/film noir kind of thing, where Jack plays a private eye. He starts out investigating the chief engineer for L.A.’s Department of Water and Power to see if he’s having an affair. But then he turns up dead, and Jack finds himself embroiled in this whole crazy conspiracy, along with the engineer’s wife, Faye. This is such a great movie because it has so many intricate layers that slowly unfold, and everyone in it is just so excellent.

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North by Northwest (1959). This started out promising, but then it kind of took a turn and went off in a direction that I was not so very interested in. It starts when Cary Grant is mistaken for some guy named George Kaplan, and he’s pursued by these mysterious dudes and has no idea what it is they want. That part was good! But then he meets Eva Marie Saint and starts to figure stuff out, and then it just kind of got stupid, or maybe I just lost interest, but in any case I felt like it was not as good as it could have been.

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Some Like it Hot (1959). I had never seen a Marilyn Monroe movie before, and this one sure was wacky. I did see that fairly terrible movie Connie and Carla a few years ago, though, and it turns out this is exactly the same plot except, you know, better. Anyway, these two musicians, Joe and Jerry, witness a murder by a bunch of Chicago gangsters. Clearly the only way to protect themselves is to crossdress, join an all-ladies band, and run off to Florida. They both fall for one of the band members (Marilyn, duh) and one of them poses as a millionaire to trick her into falling in love with her. Then an actual millionaire falls in love with the other one (who’s dressed like a lady, of course). Um. This is a very silly screwball comedy, but it was enjoyable too.

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The Grapes of Wrath (1940). It turns out you should never be an Oklahoma farmer during the Great Depression. Who knew!? Basically, the Joad family is kicked off their land when the bank forecloses on them. They head to California in search of work, but the road trip there is super not fun, and it turns out California kind of sucks too. I read the book a long time ago, and I remember that it ends on a much more depressing note than the movie. It’s probably a good thing that the film went for that glimmer of hope, because damn, this is not a happy film. It’s a pretty great movie, but it definitely won’t restore your faith in the American Dream.

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Easy Rider (1969). I can’t get over how much I loved this movie! Like, I was not alive in the ’60s, and I have never lived in the States, but I feel like this film perfectly captured the atmosphere of 1960s America. So, Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper are these two hippies who sell a bunch of coke to make a bunch of money, then head from L.A. to New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Along the way, they meet a rancher, hang out in a commune, befriend an alcoholic lawyer played by Jack Nicholson and have a bad trip when they take LSD in a graveyard with some prostitutes. It also turns out that southern rednecks totally hate hippies. It’s filled with all these great landscape shots and lots of weird, distinct editing, plus a soundtrack that feels very emblematic of the era. What a weird, great film!

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Anything but clothes

When I was in university, I didn’t really go to theme parties. I didn’t go to ugly sweater parties or CEO and office hoes parties (um, gross) or whatever. I didn’t even really get into Halloween – I would always decide to go out at the last minute, buy a wig, wear all the jewelry I owned and tell everyone I was a raver.

I feel like I should have gotten more into that junk, because since university, I’ve gone to retro nights, Mad Men parties, MTV pub crawls (I dressed like Snooki, duh) and I realized I could use Halloween as an excuse to dress like all my favourite movie/TV/web comic characters (Regina George! Enid Coleslaw! The Log Lady! Anxiety Girl!). So while I was initially skeptical when my friend Megan announced her birthday party was going to have an anything but clothes theme, in the end I decided to embrace it. It helped that I recently watched an episode of Project Runway with a duct tape challenge.

My dress did not turn out quite like this.

My dress did not turn out quite like this.

Clearly I can’t like, sew, and I definitely can’t sew DUCT TAPE, but I know how to tape things to other things, goddamnit, so that’s what I did. I took a garbage bag, cut three holes in it, made little to no attempt to create a dress-like shape, then taped strips of purple zebra print duct tape all over it. It actually turned out pretty OK! It had giant ’80s sleeves, and when I threw on a belt it even had a shape. Here’s the final result:

Not bad, right?!

Not bad, right?!

Everyone actually did a pretty good job of creating wearable things. I would post a whole bunch of pictures, but I probably shouldn’t put pictures of people I don’t know super well wearing tinfoil and newspaper all over my blog I guess, so here are just a couple of my good friends, who hopefully won’t mind too much.

A lounge chair pillow + duct tape and table cloths.

A lounge chair pillow + duct tape and table cloths.

She made this elegant gown in five minutes!

She made this gown in five minutes!

Pretty good theme party. It should hold me over until Halloween, when I will probably go as either Margo Tenenbaum or Clementine Kruczynski. Big decisions, important decisions.

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What to Wear: floral

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Well now here is an exciting thing: I’ve decided I want to start doing some outfit posts. My outfits aren’t necessarily that interesting all the time, but I very much enjoy talking/thinking/dreaming about clothes, so now this is happening and you’re just going to have to accept it. My friend Nicole has kindly allowed me to take part in her What to Wear series, which means that I’ll be posting an outfit every two weeks that follows a specific theme. I’m joining a group of lovely lady bloggers (I’m sorry, I can’t think of a better term to describe fashionable women who blog, seriously I’m so sorry) who will also be posting their take on the theme every couple of weeks.

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I will never be able to pose in a way that is not awkward.

This week, the theme is floral. I love patterns, I’m totally into floral, so this one was fun for me. Plus, it’s spring! Sure, we had a huge gross snowstorm yesterday in New Brunswick, but the calendar says spring, and that means it’s flower time. I came very close to selling this dress last year when I was getting ready to move, but I’m so glad I didn’t, because I’ve actually started wearing it a lot for events like getting drunk with my friends or going to a house party where I don’t know anyone. I feel like it’s just the right amount of adorable for a casual outfit. I mean, yes it’s kind of short, but I believe in the theory that nothing is too short as long as you wear tights and don’t bend over in public. Wow, I know so much about fashion!

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It’s still cold out, this jacket is necessary.

The other thing I know about fashion is that nothing looks cuter with a ruffly floral dress than COWBOY BOOTS. Actually, the great thing about cowboy boots is that you can wear them with literally anything ever and everyone will think you know how to use a lasso! Also, these boots fit over my cankles, which is sadly a serious thing I have to take into consideration when buying boots. I’m thinking of starting a cankle support group actually, is anyone in? No? Just me? Yep. That’s what I thought.

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Dress: Modcloth
Jacket: Modcloth
Boots: Gift from somewhere in Wyoming
Belt: Envy
Necklace: The Black Market (Halifax)
Bracelet: Modcloth
Tights: Macy’s

Oh! And make sure you check out everyone else who’s participating this week by reading Nicole’s blog post, here.

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So, like, what do I actually eat?

I’ve been thinking of doing this post for a while, but I’ve been hesitant, because I don’t want anyone to think I actually know what I’m talking about. But after eating way too many Mini Eggs and movie popcorn over the weekend (seriously, what are they putting in Mini Eggs, is it crack? I think it’s crack) I feel terrible and I need to get back on track food-wise. This is going to be totally inspirational…for me!

So, first I should probably say that I’m totally embarrassed every time I tell people I’m not eating gluten. I mean, I don’t have celiac disease, I don’t have any serious reason to think I have a gluten intolerance, so I know it’s stupid. I recognize that the whole not eating wheat thing is the trendy diet of the moment, and I’ve never attempted to follow a trendy diet in my life until now.

But all that said, it does seem to work for me. Basically in September I read the book Wheat Belly, which I thought made some interesting points about how modern wheat isn’t great for human consumption. I’m not going to go into a whole explanation of the premise behind the book, because – did I mention I really don’t know what I’m talking about? Anyway, I had been feeling tired and bloated and junk, and I wanted to lose some weight, so I figured I would try giving up wheat to see what happened. It wasn’t that bad, actually! Like, the first couple of weeks were kind of rough, but then I just didn’t really think about it that much, to be honest. And I don’t have much willpower or self-control, so I think that proves that it’s really not THAT difficult. I haven’t lost that much weight – about 15 pounds in total – but I also haven’t really, like, tried. I haven’t been exercising, and I eat all the time (though if I keep eating Mini Eggs I’m going to gain all the weight back in the next week, seriously, I’ve been eating so many Mini Eggs, this is a cry for help).

The thing that makes me think there’s something to this is that, when I DO eat properly and have breakfast, lunch and dinner with a couple snacks, I don’t feel insanely hungry throughout the day in between meals like I used to. In the afternoons after lunch, I used to feel like I was STARVING and I would have to eat chips or pretzels or something, and now I just feel…fine. I will maybe eat some sunflower seeds, but if I don’t have any, I don’t feel like I will die of hunger. I have been feeling tired lately due to my whole unrelated insomnia thing, but most of the time I feel like I have more energy, and I don’t feel bloated after eating.

OK, so, what DO I eat? Well, I am a terrible example because I hate to cook and there was never much variety in the things I ate, so I basically make like, three different things. I mean, this is fine for me, I have always been like this. There was one year when I basically lived on Kraft Dinner and Wal-Mart brand pizza pockets (gross), and there was that summer where I pretty much only ate spaghetti and peanut butter sandwiches, so like, this is definitely an improvement. And if you DO cook, there are approximately a million things you can make. But anyway, I said I was going to tell you what eat, so here we go. I even took pictures! These are not good pictures and this is not interesting food, but I don’t know, I like looking at pictures in blog posts.

breakfast

This is what I eat for breakfast literally every single day! It is vanilla greek yogurt with mixed berries and crunchy flax. It’s so delicious, it’s basically like eating a sundae YES I KNOW HOW LAME THAT IS but seriously, it tastes super good and I literally never get sick of it ever.

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This is my favourite goddamn dinner ever; if something has avocado in it, it is automatically amazing. This is a salad with salmon, avocado and feta. I sometimes get SUPER creative and use chicken or tuna instead of salmon. For lunch every day, I eat some kind of salad, sometimes with avocado, usually with sliced chicken. It turns out basically all salad dressings have canola oil in them, which is like, bad, so I just put basil-infused olive oil on my salad, which I buy from the insanely amazing olive oil tasting bar across the street from me.

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This is the other thing I eat alllll the time: chicken and asparagus. See also: salmon and asparagus. As I recently explained to my friend Molly (who doesn’t like asparagus, which is weird), not only is asparagus delicious, but it also makes your pee smell funny for some reason! It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Anyway, yeah, I eat this a lot.

The other thing I eat (not pictured, sorry!) is omelettes. Usually I make them with mozzarella and prosciutto and feta and they’re really frigging good. I also eat snacks! At work I usually eat a whole whack of baby carrots, occasionally some cheese and I usually have a bunch of sunflower seeds with me. And I swear I don’t usually eat Mini Eggs as if my life depended on it, but I do regularly eat some dark chocolate, sometimes with natural peanut butter, which is basically the best most delicious thing ever.

And I mean…that’s pretty much all I normally eat! I do go to restaurants maybe once every week or two and I don’t always ask if things are gluten-free, so it is very possible I have eaten things with traces of gluten. I’M SORRY I CAN’T BE PERFECT. Still, I think I’ve been doing a pretty OK job, and as I say, it just seems to be working for me, so I plan to keep it up, at least for now. At some point in the next few months, I do want to step it up and lose another 10 pounds, but I’m not too stressed about it. I think I can make it happen once the goddamn Easter candy is off the shelves.

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Save Amanda!

The greatest thing about our culture is that we’re totally obsessed with celebrities! I’m only sort of kidding. If we didn’t have rich, famous, beautiful people to obsess over, we might have to focus on our actual lives, which, let’s be honest, are totally boring most of the time. Regular people are all like, blah blah I got a promotion! Oh look, I gave birth to a human and now I will dedicate my life toward posting Facebook pictures of it! Help me, I’m trapped under my hoard of old newspapers and Beanie Babies! So boring, right? Not like celebrities, who are always DRUNK and having affairs with their COSTARS and wearing DESIGNER LABELS while DRINKING and then going to REHAB. Ugh, so glamorous.

Clearly celebrities are way better than us, but thanks to social media and gossip blogs, we also get to see them at their lowest lows. It’s important that we put them on a pedestal only to knock them down when they mess up. Again, this makes us feel better about ourselves. If someone better than us can fail, how bad can our stupid problems possibly be? Usually it’s a great system, but there are a few rare celebrities who actually seem kind of likeable in addition to being fabulous, and in those rare cases, their inevitable breakdown is actually pretty sad. Anyway, this is all just a really long way of saying I’m concerned about Amanda Bynes.

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Amanda, back in the good old days.

You remember Amanda Bynes! She was the star of the Nickelodeon series The Amanda Show, and then she was in a series of teen movies – What a Girl Wants, She’s the Man, Sydney White. I’m the same age as her, and I was inexplicably into her movies, even though I was in university when they came out, and was probably way too old to be excited about a film that’s loosely based on the plot of Snow White for some reason. I don’t know, Amanda Bynes was always funny and kind of offbeat but weirdly relatable.

And then things got weird. A couple years ago she started deleting and undeleting her Twitter, announcing her retirement and return to acting. So that was weird, but around that time she appeared in Easy A, which was actually pretty great, and Amanda plays the Mandy Moore to Emma Stone’s Jenna Malone. Bet you didn’t expect a Saved reference, did you!? Basically she plays a bitchy religious girl and it’s awesome.

But then things got REALLY weird, because last year Amanda dyed her hair lilac, got some DUIs, had a series of car accidents, lost her licence, drove without her licence  and…tweeted at Barack Obama to fire a cop who arrested her? Oh, and then there were the times she locked herself in a changing room for two hours, locked herself in a cupcake store bathroom and maybe walked around a tanning salon naked. Also, she got kicked out of her apartment building for smoking weed or something.

OK, so none of these things are good, but it’s her recent tweets combined with her recent Instagram pictures that are troubling. Yes, I follow Amanda Bynes on Twitter and Instagram, OBVIOUSLY. Check this out:

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She is posting vague sentiments about love, and if my Facebook friends have taught me anything, that is ALWAYS a sign of impending disaster. And then there’s this:

But whyyyy?

But whyyyy?

Yep. That is Amanda Bynes! That is what she looks like now. Clearly things have gone too far. Girl is wearing a dehydrated wig and some kind of plastic nails. I’m not even going to address her pierced cheeks. I’ve made it clear that I’m all for a good celebrity breakdown, but not like this! Amanda never did anything to make me hate her, so I just want to help! So far I’ve just been replying to a lot of her tweets. I don’t think it’s helping. I think I’m going to plan an intervention, or at least an awareness campaign. Everyone loves a good awareness campaign! Remember that time when we failed to Free Katie back in 2006? Don’t you want to make up for it? Yeah, that’s right. I’m working on Save Amanda t-shirts right now. It’s the right thing to do.

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Sleep is overrated

I haven’t really posted anything in the last week because I’ve been pretty busy being super anxious and not sleeping. The thing about insomnia is, it makes regular day-to-day life so much harder. It’s like, do I want to do literally anything at all, or do I want to lie on this couch for six hours and stare at the TV. It’s fine though, I’ve been terrible at sleeping my whole life, so I’m pretty used to it by now. Over the years, I’ve tried a lot of solutions, and none of them actually work for me. Admittedly, I’ve never used prescription medication, but I’m worried about side effects like sleep eating or sleep driving or sleep shopping or death, so I’m planning to keep avoiding them if I can help it. Still, I’m basically an insomnia expert, so here are some of the things I’ve tried, and the many ways in which they have not worked at all for the most part.

Melatonin and valerian. These are like, natural things or something (valerian is a plant I think, I don’t really know wtf melatonin is) and they’re both supposed to help with insomnia, but I’m pretty sure they are actually just placebos. I’ve tried taking one or the other, both at the same time…nothing. I’ve never even experienced a more relaxed state, never mind a more sleepy one.

Sleep aid apps. Admittedly, I only tried this for the first time last week in a fit of desperation, but it turns out there are a whole bunch of sleep aid apps out there. I went for Sleep Pillow because it has a free version and it’s like, do I want to pay money to listen to supposedly relaxing noises? Eh, not really. The sound options are OK…I tried one that sounds like rain for a couple of nights, because the one that sounds like a rainforest is totally annoying. How can anyone sleep in a rainforest with all those goddamn frogs? It didn’t seem to do much for me, but maybe I need to branch out and try some of the other white noise/relaxation apps that are available.

Going to bed early. People say that if you go to bed early and don’t look at screens right before you’re likely to sleep better; I have not found this to be the case. Instead, I just have to toss and turn and think about all the things I have to do the next day from 11 p.m.- 3 a.m., instead of from 1-3 a.m., so I may as well just stay up and watch Seinfeld while writing blog entries and tweeting instead.

Reading. I think the problem with this is that I try to avoid reading super boring things, and therefore I actually want to stay up later to keep reading. What I should probably do is reread all the boring junk I had to read that time when I got my arts degree. I cannot even count how many times I fell asleep while reading Plato or John Locke or Thomas Hardy or whatever. Seriously, do people LIKE Tess of the d’Ubervilles??

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Breathing exercises. I don’t know what’s wrong with my stupid brain, but taking deep, focused breaths doesn’t tend to help me much with either insomnia or anxiety. Actually, when I’m feeling anxious and I try to think about my breathing, I start to think about my respiratory system and I worry that thinking about it too much will cause it to fail somehow (because that’s normal) and then I start thinking things like, what if there isn’t enough oxygen going to my lungs, am I dying I’m definitely going to die, oh my god, I’ve forgotten how to breathe, what is happening. It’s just best if I try to always avoid thinking about breathing and just let my body do it on its own.

Unisom. OK, technically this over the counter sleep aid does work, but it’s so not worth it. It takes almost two hours for it to properly kick in for me, which means I have to decide whether or not I’m going to take it pretty early. Once it kicks in, it basically knocks me out into a dreamless sleep, and I inevitably wake up feeling groggy and sort of like I’ve been run over by a bus for the next few hours. I may as well just not sleep.

Focusing on something mindless. Actually, this one works too…sometimes. The idea is to focus on something mindless to avoid thinking about all the more serious and anxiety-inducing things your (my) brain wants to think about. It’s the basic concept behind counting sheep (I have tried this, does not work). Usually I play a version of Scattergories, except I pick a category and then go through the alphabet. The good thing about this is, if anyone’s ever like, “Hey Alex, what’s a fruit that starts with the letter E?” I’ll be all like, “Elderberry, bitch.”

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Alcohol. THIS IS THE BEST ONE! I realized this on Thursday when I went out for martinis and fell asleep within 30 minutes of getting into bed. I mean, I also woke up with dry mouth and felt slightly nauseous, but I slept through the whole night! I think the moral of the story is, it’s time for me to develop a drinking problem. Don’t judge me, it’s for the sake of my health!

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I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse

It’s the chance to learn about my progress with my AFI’s 100 Years…100 Movies project, which is also the perfect opportunity for me to bastardize quotes from The Godfather. We all lose win! February was a pretty intense month, because I had to watch seven films on the list in addition to all the other movies I watched for work or just because. PLUS I watched House of Cards in its entirety over the last week. Someday, someone’s going to make a terrible movie about me called I Don’t Know How She Does It. Oh. Wait. Anyway, let’s get on with it!

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Double Indemnity (1944). This one was pretty great! Basically this insurance agent guy played by Fred MacMurray falls for Barbara Stanwyk and they plot to kill off her husband and make off with the insurance money. It seems like a foolproof plan since buddy knows how the biz works, but obviously there are a variety of pitfalls along the way. I love the way people talk in old movies. I don’t know if people in real life were just more eloquent in the ’40s, but I’m going to choose to believe they were.

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Rear Window (1954). I mean, obviously Alfred Hitchcock is known as the master of suspense for a reason; what impressed me about Rear Window is how incredibly captivating it was, despite being so confined. Jimmy Stewart is a photographer who’s in a wheelchair following an accident, and is stuck staring out the window at other people’s lives the whole time. He has some visitors, like his girlfriend, Grace Kelly, his nurse and his police friend, but really it’s all about him staring out a window and possibly witnessing a murder. The film manages to be really tense, especially when we’re not sure if Jimmy’s gone crazy, but it’s also funny at times, and all around entertaining. The way that it all takes place in one setting makes it feel kind of like a really brilliant play or something.

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Network (1976). I feel like it’s kind of weird I had never seen the film that spawned the line “I’m mad as hell and I’m not gonna take it anymore.” This is the blackest of black comedy. Peter Finch plays a news anchor whose ratings are down and is about to be fired. With nothing to lose, he unleashes an angry tirade on air and, surprisingly, both the network and his audience adore him for it, and it leads to an incredibly scathing film about media, corporations and the public. I’m not sure I’ve completely wrapped my mind around this movie yet. Like, I got it, but it was just such cutting, intelligent satire that I almost couldn’t believe it was allowed to exist. I’m trying to think of a way to explain how mind-blowingly excellent Network is, but I think it’s something you just have to see for yourself.

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Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969). With the law chasing after them, medium successful train robbers Butch Cassidy (Paul Newman) and the Sundance Kid (Robert Redford) are on the run, eventually heading to Bolivia to hide out. I’m not a huge fan of westerns in general I guess, but what made this one so enjoyable was the relationship between the two leads. Butch has a lot of ideas – they’re not all good ideas, but he has a lot of them – while Sundance has the shooting skills to get them out of a lot of the situations they find themselves in. They complement each other well, and I feel like their friendship really sets it apart.

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The Last Picture Show (1971). This film is sort of a coming of age film, but more importantly it’s about a tiny, dying Texas town. It’s a quiet movie about teenagers discovering themselves and their sexuality, and also trying to find something bigger, outside of their small, suffocating world. Don’t get me wrong, this was a very good film, and I really enjoyed watching it, but I don’t think it’s one that’s really going to stick with me for whatever reason. It’s well-crafted and well-acted, but it’s also bleak as hell, and a bit too lacking in entertainment value for my liking.

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The Godfather (1972). Am I allowed to say I didn’t love The Godfather? Is that OK? Will someone put a hit out on me?  I mean, I can see why so many people love it, and I recognize that it’s a good movie, but it’s just not the kind of movie I personally enjoy. Maybe I’m just too stupid to like it, because honestly I didn’t entirely know what was going on half the time. I was sort of interested in Michael Corleone’s (Al Pacino) arc from war hero to mafia boss, as he gets entangled in his father, Vito Corleone’s (Marlon Brando) whole criminal business, but I kind of just lost patience with it after a while, and didn’t really care about who died or why. I feel like I need to apologize to someone for not liking this movie. Maybe my dad, who loves the shit out of it. SORRY DAD!

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The Godfather: Part II (1974). Actually, I enjoyed the sequel more. I thought it was much more interesting structurally, acting as both a prequel by showing Vito’s rise to power (played by Robert De Niro) and as a sequel, following Michael’s trajectory as he becomes more of a ruthless bastard, who fears he’s moving too far away from his father’s vision. It was definitely more appealing to me than the original, but like, do I ever want to watch it again? No, not really. Maybe Goodfellas will be more my scene. I’ll find out soon enough, because it’s totally on the list!

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And now for something really important…

In addition to baking an edible food item over the weekend, I made a very important decision that will affect my life…for at least the next several months.

Photo on 2013-02-23 at 5.13 PMI GOT BANGS!

Oh, bangs. Oh how I will hate having you in a month. Oh how you will fall into my eyes and get weird and curly and kind of greasy. I know all that, but I still had to do it. When I don’t have bangs, my face is so boring! I need a semi-permanent adornment for my forehead. And they will look OK to good for at least a month. It’s going to be a good month. Oh, and I also got it cut and dyed, which was very much overdue.

While we’re talking about thoroughly inconsequential things like my hair, I may as well also talk about nails. I’ve been way into nail art for the last year or so, and while I feel like I’ve tamed it down a bit, I’ve developed a bit of a love affair with nail strips. They are easy and fast and they automatically look good.

First I tried a whole bunch of Sally Hansen Real Nail Polish Strips. They do come in a lot of awesome patterns, but I kind of find they don’t always stay stuck very well. Certain patterns are too thick, and not really flexible or sticky enough. Then I discovered these OPI Pure Lacquer Nail Apps, which are better, in that they’re thinner, easier to use and last longer, but for some reason I can never find more than one or two patterns at any store around here. Maybe I’m just not looking hard enough. I admittedly have not looked very hard.

And now Essie Sleek Sticks are a thing. They were giving out free samples on Facebook, so I signed up and got four different patterns (two of each) in sneek-e, a to zebra, stickers and stones and don’t cheetah on me. I guess I could have spaced it out and used them as an accent nail, but I just wanted to try them all at once, so, well, I did.

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Please excuse my dour expression.

I do like them…I find they’re a bit thick for my liking, but they seem to stick well. The samples I got are all the same size, so I’m sure they would fit my nails better if I were to buy the full set, which comes in various sizes. I only just put them on, so I don’t know yet how long they’re going to last, but I have a feeling I’m going to be purchasing oh my gold! and over the moon in the not so distant future.

And I promise not to post about nail junk all the time, especially since, as I said, I really haven’t been doing anything especially interesting anyway, but if for some reason you are DYING to see some of my previous designs, you’re so incredibly lucky, because I’ve pinned them right here. Fascinating, I know.

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